I have been in love with my best friend for 7 1/2 years. I was rejected by him all those years ago and my intuition told me to leave for a bit to heal....well now it has become what I knew it would become....a very toxic relationship. I have been verbally abused for years and I want to heal and stop allowing this to happen. Yes, there is a deep connection between me and my friend. We have been told numerous times that we have shared past lives together and I knew this upon meeting him again in this lifetime....but I am hurting so deeply due to being such a deep and empathic soul! I would so appreciate all help and support!
Have you ever read the book "The Seven Levels of Intimacy" by Matthew Kelly? If not, this book is a great book to read when you desire to learn more about relationship roles and cycles. I read it. It was a good book. One key element I got from reading it was that the purpose of every relationship is to help the other party become a better version of themselves. First of all, maybe evaluate if you are being of complete service to your partner to help and support them in their evolution in this lifetime. If you can honestly say you are (setting ego and judgement aside and being fully present for your partner) then the second question arises. Do you feel as though your partner is doing the same for you? They say that relationships are 50/50. That isn't the truth. Some say we must each bring 100% of ourselves to the relationship. I'm not so sure this is realistic. What I believe is that we must approach a relationship without the filters of judgement, without the ulterior motives of personal gain, and with honest intention. Most of us are rarely fully present in this way. I can admit I am not at times in my relationships. We are here in this human encasement with our thinky thinky brains constantly at work to overpower our true essence. But if we really work toward this type of giving and are always cognizant of the good possibility that others MAY not be responding to us without the filters, then we can observe the experience and determine if it is best for us. The troublesome experience you appear to be having with your partner may actually be beneficial to you to a point to help in your evolution... such as maybe with developing patience or seeing the gift in the challenge. Once you feel you have mastered these attributes, then maybe it is time to move on and find a situation that can bring you more peace. Not heart-ache. Meditate on it if you haven't. Then realize that even those who we are at the greatest odds with in our lives can be 'soul mates' or those we have experienced in past lives. It doesn't mean you are meant to spend the rest of your life with them. I believe that we have many soul mates (being that a soul mate to me is someone who comes into our lives to help us learn the most profound lessons.)
Love and light,