Joy, Izza Luv Thang
I wrote this maxim more than two decades ago that says, 'Joy, we must look for, misery will find us.' Well, maybe not always.
Decades ago, when I was in acting school, an assignment for the following week was to express joy. I had no problem with the other emotions we were to emulate. Yet, I had no idea what joy felt like. While walking down Highland, passing Hollywood Boulevard, just past where I worked at Max Factor, suddenly, what I could only describe as joy seized me. A better description is that it passed through me. Wow! Is that what joy feels like?!
At the time, I had no idea what was the modus operandi of suddenly experiencing joy. Now, of course, I know. It was the same as when suddenly I began crying and stopped just as quickly without any reason for doing so, wondering, 'What the heck was that all about?' Then I went about my business.
Today, as several times before, after reading a particular e-mail, joy passed through me again. I hung onto the feeling, wanting to know why joy was enveloping me.
Everything was in order. I needed to fix nothing that I had not arranged to fix. I was in order. No residual angst resided from past programming. No outstanding disagreements or confusions existed, which I could appease anyway, so, must leave alone the fate of others. I have no control of their fates, so, must be at my own peace.
It is difficult when another puts its fate in our hands. I've been feeding this ill-tempered stray cat who enjoys my food, but not my company. I've written before about Alvin. He didn't show up for the past two nights. Two mornings earlier, however, vomited cat food was on my porch step. It wasn't the food I fed Alvin. I could see as he didn't fully digest it. I knew something happened to him. It was like he didn't feel well and was coming to me, but once vomited, he left. Or, he came when I was asleep and I didn't know he was outside. It wouldn't be the first time some cat hater deliberately poisoned cats around here. Any reason, however, could exist for Alvin vomiting up cat food. Alvin didn't come last night either. Sometimes, I won't see him for weeks. Then he shows up. I'm figuring it's a female feline, but I'm waiting. Despite his mooching ill-tempered personality, I still worry about the little twerp. Even the most cantankerous animals have a way of worming themselves into our hearts.
It's a lost art among humans.
Along my walk, while hanging onto the feeling of joy, I began to analyze it. The world is in turmoil. Why should I be joyous? I almost have no right to feel joyous. The phrase from Desiderata, 'Go placidly amid the noise & haste, . . . ' flashed into my mind. The Arab Spring and worldwide Occupy groups abound. Genuine Occupiers are trying to keep it peaceful.
But, that's great! People are peacefully changing the world, hopefully, for the better. Hopefully, they do. Hopefully, those in power take them seriously and listen.
That is the big 'IF.' Some humans are just way too screwed up.
It is like, the (Wen) tier in Five (5) that is a cyst of psychological negativity, bursting to allow healing. 2012 is a Five (5) year. Does this mean, healing of our planet is on the horizon from the work now being done to bring us a (New) beginning?
Nevertheless, we must keep putting one foot in front of the other and know when we do good, good comes from it. Despite what happens though, even a Civil War brought this country to a wonderful place.
The sudden feeling of inexplicable joy, feels just like being in love. It must be what some believe to be their god's love. Does it matter? It's like a perfect Spring day when the Sun shines and flowers bloom despite cold breezes and snow. When it comes, it is so rare, embrace it.
... stay tuned ...